Today I thought I would write quite a different post today on a topic that is very close to my heart. Some of you may know that I have been with my boyfriend for quite a while now... in fact, it's going to be 5 years in August. WOW! Even that scares me... I'm only 21 as well! It's mad but both Tom and I are as happy as ever in our relationship.
The other day however, after 5 blissful days of Tom coming to stay with me in Bournemouth, I found it more difficult than usual saying goodbye to my guy as he made his way back to Bristol, as I knew I wasn't going to see him for at least 2 weeks, possibly more with the business of uni exams and what not at this time of year, but it got me to thinking how I've said goodbye to him many times over the past few years and I've always gotten through it, so I decided today to write a blog post about my tips for being in a long distance relationship - this is not that I am an expert or anything, but I do feel after 3 years of being in one I definitely have a few nuggets of wisdom to impart!
1) Make sure you're on the same page
If you're about to leave for uni or live in a different from your significant other, it can be a really scary thing. Another really scary thing can be having a conversation with your other half about what's going to happen next. I know, it can be really horrible thinking about all the possible scenarios about what they might say, but it is SO important to be on the same page. Have a chat with your partner and ask them how they feel about the change, what they think will come of it and ultimately, do they think that they will be happy if the relationship carries on. One of the worst things you can do is going into a long relationship and pretend that doubts and fears aren't there, either your own or your partners, and I think if you two aren't in agreement about where you want the relationship to go, then it's going to be difficult to make it work.
2) Give it a go
In saying that, I am so pro just giving it a go. You never know how things are going to turn out until you try it and if you break it off before you give it a go, you may always wonder what could have been. As well as this, don't listen to people who tell you long distance doesn't work, because I'm here to tell you it can! Try and stay as positive as possible, but keep in mind that it might not work out.
3) Planning
I think one of the key components of a long distance relationship is having something to look forward to, whether that's a long facetime call at the end of the day or booking train tickets to go and see them, it can bring morale in the relationship up so much higher to have things to look forward to together. On a side note, communication is key as always and I think that you need to catch up with your partner regularly and vice versa to make sure you both know that you're still invested.
4) Talk it out
If you have any doubts and fears whilst in the long distance relationship it is so important to discuss them with your partner. A good way to know if your partner is invested in the relationship is if they make time to help you and discuss fears your having and put your mind at rest. An extra point to this section is if you feel as if your partner is not pulling your weight and the relationship is making you unhappy, talk it out, or potentially, break it off with them. A long-distance relationship is only going to work if both parties are invested.
Thanks for reading this post, I hope it gave you all some good advice! My relationship is not perfect, we do argue and find it hard sometimes, and we even took a few months break from the relationship 2 years ago which was horrible but made us come out stronger. If you have any further questions you can message me on Twitter or Instagram (@yasminanicole)
Love, Yasmin
great post! There are many success stories when it comes to long term relationship, cheesy as it sounds, I believe that love wins over all:).
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post! :) I will have been with my boyfriend for 5 years in November, and we are also doing long distance. I totally agree with everything you say in this post, but it definitely sucks when you can't be with each other <3 I'm here for you if you ever need support! :)
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You guys are so cute together! I'm lucky to live close to my boyfriend but I know that we could make it work long distance communication is key to everything! x
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Good tips! I definitely know a few couples who have made long distance relationships work!
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